Tag Archives: Nerds

Junk Food

Nerds Lucha Grande Lime vs Pineapple and Guava vs Mango Chile

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Welcome to my new site, Muncha Libre. Here, we discuss wrestling-related food and wrestling-related food ONLY.

…I’m being informed by my Google search that the name Muncha Libre appears to be taken by a line of luchador-themed cookie cutters, which are adorable. I guess it’s back to ol’ Junk Food Betty.

The inspiration for this sudden change in focus comes from these absolutely darling Nerds ¡Lucha Grande!, which have apparently been around since 2017. And, it seems, the Internet hasn’t quite caught up to them either. Not a lot of reviews out there.

And what a shame, because look at these beautiful boxes. I’ve never seen such a story unfold on a box of candy before. Stories, I should say. Two boxes, four new flavors, and four unique luchador Nerds. I love them all.

Lime vs. Pineapple

First we have Lima Intensa vs. Piña Furiosa. I love that the nature of the Nerds mascots makes them look like they all grabbed some socks from Nana’s winter drawer to use as masks, but at the same time, I want to appreciate the fact that whoever designed this box actually took the time to not only give the Nerds necks, but also imagined what a lucha mask would look like around them. Fantastic.

Lima’s sticking to a more generic all-green look, but I admire Piña for both the lightning bolt design and the yellow/green combo, really repping the colors of the pineapple. Why didn’t they call her Piña Eléctrica?

Piña may win the round for best lucha look, but I’ve gotta give it to Lima for the flavor. Purely a personal preference. Piña Furiosa is fine as a representative of pineapple candy. I just don’t like that flavor. Imagine the pineapple Lifesaver in the original fruit roll; these Nerds taste exactly like that. Come to think of it, I haven’t seen a roll of fruity Lifesavers in forever. Just imagine a straightforward pineapple candy.

Lime is the same way – think of your favorite lime-flavored candy and you’re 99% there. If you’re me, remember the good times when green Skittles were lime- and not green apple-flavored. Ah, yes, there we go.

Guava vs. Mango Chile

Our second match-up is between Guayaba Solitaria and El Mango Fuego. Obviously, this match is the main attraction. We’ve got two luchas with fire-themed masks, but they’ve taken it in different directions.

EMF gets points for sticking with flame-related colors, but look at the stitch work on Guayaba! So detailed! The combination of neon pink with green reminds me of an unreadable geocities website, but I can’t deny that it really makes the mask details pop. Those jagged eyebrows! You might not be solitaria forever, Guayaba. You’ve pinned my heart.

Guava is a slightly more exotic flavor than lime or pineapple, but again, the Nerds taste is pretty straightforward. I could go into some flowery language about it, but it tastes like guava candy. Bright and tropical.

Call me crazy, but I’m guessing that any interest in this candy lies mostly in Mango Chile. (And the luchadors, of course.) The mango flavor is front-and-center, again being exactly as advertised. The chile part was pretty subtle for spicy candy – you’re not enduring an Atomic Fireball Challenge.

There’s also no distinct flavor to the spice; it’s not cinnamon or even what I’d call “chile”, just a bit of a heat zing as an aftertaste. Hot candy isn’t really for me, but I think it’s a fun addition that doesn’t overwhelm the mango flavor.

Willy Wonka’s ¡Lucha Grande! Nerds are part of a larger line of Wonka candy inspired by “Spanish candy store” flavors. There’s Guava and Pineapple Laffy Taffy, Pineapple, Mango Lime, and Cucumber Watermelon Pixy Stix, and those last two also show up as Fun Dip flavors with Lime- and Tamarind-flavored dipping sticks. Neat!

Except apparently this strategy didn’t go so great, since the press release points towards a now defunct website where you could see the ¡Lucha Grande! Nerds in comic strips that I now desperately want to find and make fun of.

That’s right, between the time I acquired these Nerds and the time I reviewed them, the entire ad campaign for this line of candies went extinct. Listen, the candy was a little expired when I reviewed it, but not that expired. Have a little faith, Wonka! Give these flavors another chance!

As for our little leftist corner (real name tbd, possibly never), you don’t have to go far on this one. Willy Wonka is owned by Nestle, a company that steals water. I won’t even link you to a specific article; just look for yourself.

Nerds ¡Lucha Grande! Lime vs Pineapple and Guava vs Mango Chile

  • Score: 4 out of 5 adorable little luchador masks for everyone!
  • Price: $0.79-1.19 MSRP
  • Size: 1.65 oz. box
  • Purchased at: Ask my mom
  • Nutritional Quirk: lol look at this picture and tell me this is how many Nerds you eat in a sitting
Junk Food

Spooky Nerds

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Nerds LogoThis probably won’t be a full-on review, but I wanted to immortalize these Spooky Nerds on the Internet. When you see these big bags of Halloween candy with smaller, individually-wrapped packages inside, they usually put little effort into getting into the holiday spirit. They might throw a bat or a tombstone on the outer bag, but that’s about it. I guess they figure that the kids don’t give a shit if it looks spooky, and the adults are only buying the candy to hand it out to little assholes so their house doesn’t get egged, so who cares about Halloween themery?

Well, I’ll tell you who: Willy motherfucking Wonka.

Spooky Nerds

Check it out! Nerds running wild, dressed up as a witch, a ghost who is apparently vision impaired, and, flipping the bird to fundamentalist Christians everywhere, a little devil holding a pitchfork. With…fangs. Who is brown, which is odd, since there don’t appear to be any brown Nerds in this bag. Perhaps he’s meant to symbolize diversity. Wonka is totally a liberal.

That white one actually came in the orange box. Being imperfect makes Spooky Nerds even cuter.
That white one actually came in the orange box. Being imperfect makes Spooky Nerds even cuter.

Here’s where Nerds really beats out the competition in Halloween coolness. It’s not just the bag that’s spooky – it’s the mini boxes inside, too! I would have liked to have seen black Nerds instead of white, but I understand – white fruit punch Nerds are already featured in several other Nerd varieties, so it’s easy to just toss them in a box. Orange Nerds are a little more inscrutable, as I’ve never seen them featured in the classic Nerd “two flavors, two sides” boxes. But then I remembered the gigantic boxes of Nerds they sell at movie theatre concession stands.

Rainbow Nerds

Goddamn, those boxes are huge. I’d imagine you’d be seeing rainbow going down AND coming up if you tried to eat that whole box in the course of one movie. Anyway, it looks like there could be some orange in there, but, unless you’ve got a serious case of OCD, you’re not separating all those flavors out, you’re just putting your mouth to the box, tipping up, and flooding your mouth with little tangy candies. Never before have orange Nerds appeared in such a pure form. Now’s your time to shine, guys.

Fruit punch Nerds get the little devil, sans pitchfork. I won’t go too much into the taste, since I’m sure most people have had fruit punch Nerds at least once in their lives, but I will say that they are indeed tiny, tangy, and crunchy. For being so small, Wonka does a good job of packing in the flavor. They’re loaded with that blurred, vaguely tropical taste fruit punch usually has. Actually, they taste a lot like Hawaiian Punch, which has that little zing in addition to its punchiness. Fruit punch Nerds get extra points for recalling memories of drinking Hawaiian Punch out of a can during summer break.

Orange Nerds get the little ghost guy at the bottom of the outer package that I couldn’t get into the shot. Actually, it looks kind of like a bat wearing a ghost costume. Double Halloween-y! That’s awesome.

Orange Nerds taste exactly like you would expect, which is like, well, artificially flavored orange candy. They never really taste like an actual orange, but they always have that citrus zip that lends itself well to Nerds and their claims of being tangy. If you like, say, the little oranges in Runts candy, you’ll like orange Nerds.

Maybe the kids these days won’t appreciate the effort Willy Wonka has made in turning Nerds into Halloween treats, but I would love getting a box or two of these way more than getting a fun-sized Milky Way that looks like the same candy bar I could get at the store any of the other 364 days out of the year. I think they make trick-or-treating just a bit more festive. BatGhost rules.

  • Score: 4 out of 5 newt eyes
  • Price: Free – my mom sent them as a Halloween present
  • Size: 1.16 lb. bag (It doesn’t say how many boxes are in the bag, and I’m not counting.)
  • Purchased at: I don’t know, so let’s just say, HAGRA’S HOUSE OF HORRORS
  • Nutritional Quirks: No brown Nerds inside.